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My 39th B-Day

Do you remember your birthday parties this year? For H, BTS ALL THE WAY! And, for A, EMOJI WORLD! My favorite thing is celebrating you guys and your lives! Every year for your birthday, I made sure we did something very special to celebrate. I wonder which trip or cool birthday gift was your favorite.

For my birthday this year, Bethany and I will celebrate by going to an island called Vancouver Island. I think you guys would enjoy it because it involves a huge ferry and while we're on the ferry we could look for sea creatures, like seals or even whales!

I admit, I'm trying to be cheerful but I keep wishing we could talk on my birthday. I know your mom is blocking my calls and you're not allowed to call me. You are doing nothing wrong. It's not your fault. Maybe you feel that calling/texting me would betray your mom... maybe you simply can't call because you don't have my numbers anymore... You're doing nothing wrong, Mangeel and Allool. I love you just as much as I always have and NOTHING would ever change that. No amount of time will change how much I love you.

I've decided today to include pictures of us and use first names. I'm changing that because I need to reach you. Enough is enough! I need to connect with you again! I miss you...

I really thought your mom would let you call me today. So, when she didn't, it hurt me on a level so deep ... I'm just working to recover. On this day especially, it is very hard for me to be without you, my darling daughters. I miss you and want to tell you that I love you. You are the very best gift in my life that I could have ever gotten.

Love Always,


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